Last night we had some friends visiting and after a long afternoon of helping his uncle and dad with various stuff around the house, almost 4yr old Cristiano sat down with his younger cousin to have dinner at a smaller table next to the adults (due to limited space). There appeared to be a squabble between the 2 over the position of the table and they both kept on pulling the table toward themselves in turn and in increasing intensity.
It didn’t take long to trigger me…I was tired, hungry and with limited mobility in the last stages of my pregnancy and I snapped at my son. Warned him in a load voice that if he didn’t stop the tug of war with the table then he would have to go down to his room. As soon as I blurted out my words I felt a pang in my heart. I knew it was not the right response to my child but a reaction to the situation. He was hurt at my outburst and he got up and went to his room crying. I stopped my husband from going after him and I slowly waddled my way to his room, found him on the edge of his bed, red in the face & crying. Of course he didn’t want me there. I wouldn’t want me there either. He pushed me away shouting at me to leave his room. After 2 -3 pushes and keeping eye contact I sat next to him and expressed how sorry I was. I told him he had every right to be angry and hurt. That its ok to have those feelings. I told him I shouldn’t have shouted like that at him and explained why I think it happened but still making it clear that I was wrong. I Kept apologizing and said the last person I want to hurt on this planet is you. He accepted my apology and after hugging and squeezing each other we both went happily to enjoy our dinner without any mention or repeated table tug of wars. Like nothing happened!
I think it was a moment in time where we both needed to reconnect and come ‘home”.
Also, the time to welcome our new baby is getting closer and we’re all feeling the excitement and maybe even some tension.
So I’m very grateful for moments like this so that our cups can be emptied of the yukky feelings and filled with the good ones.
Have you got similar moments to share?